Friendship

We are once again a family of six, and I have to say that it feels pretty lonely around here without our parents. I have run to the computer many times, in tears, over the past few days to blog about my loneliness, but luckily for you, my Internet has been down. At first I was determined not to write another blog about sadness (as I'm sure I'm bringing all of you down) but, as always, my emotions got the best of me and I tried to post a blog every five minutes to no avail. I am now in a better frame of mind tonight, and feel as though my sanity is being slowly restored.

The last place we went with our parents before they left was the Masai Mara. We went on a safari and had a great time. The trip is eight hours of terrible roads, and breathing in dust. By the time we got home to Kisumu I was hot, dirty and my lungs were screaming for clean air. You would not believe the amount of dirt that is on you after a trip like that. The scenery is incredible though, vast plane as far as the eye can see, at one point a leopard ran right in front of our car, which was an answer to prayer. Cassie had been praying our whole trip that we would see a leopard, as we have never seen one before. The people we talked to at the game park said leopards are rarely seen because they are very shy. It had been a hard morning, I lost the diamond in my wedding ring, we had to say good-bye to our parents, and the clutch went out in our car (luckily, with Tom babying it and a lot of prayer we were able to make it home). So needless to say, none of us were happy that morning as we were driving home. There we sat with long faces and tears, when right in front of us Cassie spotted a leopard. We stopped and watched him for awhile, stunned that the Lord had granted our insignificant request. I love that God was showing off just for us. It was exactly what we needed to remember that He is in control. That cat didn't make the pain of saying good-bye go away, but it did make us remember that the Lord didn't forget us here in Africa, He knows we are here and He is walking right alongside us.

I wish I could report that I came home with a light spirit and a song of praise on my lips, but it was quite the opposite. I cried for two days straight and didn't stop until last night when our awesome Friends came over and let me rant and rave about the injustices of my life. They let me talk, they shared the word with me, prayed for me and somewhere along the way my burden was lightened. There is something amazing that happens with godly fellowship; it is uplifting even in the most trying of times. Thank you Lord that you have made us social beings and that you are honored when we come together to help each other run the race.

Masai Mara

Loading up for our trip

Kenya/Tanzania border

Julie took this beauty

Hippo pond

Female lion

Cheetahs

Mzungus

Gram & Pop

Nana & Papa

Crawl

We are leaving on safari tomorrow morning. I can’t believe that our parents trip is almost over. The passage of time can be both enemy and friend, and I find myself seeing it as an enemy right now. My heart is sad because they are leaving, I really don’t want to be left here when they leave. I know I need to stay; there are many more things that need to be refined in me before I leave this place. I always tell everyone, Africa has a way of showing you the things you would rather not know about yourself. It breaks something in you, I don’t know if this is a good thing or not; I do know it doesn’t feel good. But I have learned I can’t always trust my feelings; growth hurts, there’s no way around it. I hope, in years to come, I can look back and see all the good that living in Africa produced, and the faith it built. I pray that I will come out reflecting more of God’s glory and that I would have less of a hold on the temporal. Thank you for all your prayers over my last blog, I feel like I’m once again up and walking (actually crawling would be a more accurate description). I’m happy with crawling (it’s better than standing still), I have decided to measure success in baby steps...... it helps me not get discouraged. Discouragement seems to be a way of life for me lately, I wish there was a way for me to describe the oppression of this place, the constant battle, but I don’t have the words. I just long for victory and know that one day it will come. For now I will continue to crawl toward that finish line and keep my eyes on the prize.
The church behind our house just started their worship service, and I find my spirit refreshed by hearing a body of believers singing out to God. One thing about Kenyans is their worship is never quiet, and right now I’m thankful for that. Although our work here is trying, and being in the cross-hairs of the enemy is tiring, the Lord renews us, and strengthens us for the work He has called us to. I have always wanted immeasurable strength, but instead the Lord seems to give me just enough strength to keep going, sometimes an inch at a time. I know this keeps me relying on Him, keeps me on my knees before God’s throne asking for help.
I’m rambling and I guess the reason for my blog it just to say that I hate that my parents and in-laws are leaving. Please pray for us as we are all going to be lonely in their absence. Cassie and Zach have had a hard few days realizing that their grandparents are leaving soon. We covet your prayers and could really use an extra dose over the next few days, not only for loneliness, but for safety in travel as we are driving to the Masai Mara, and a safe trip home for Tom and my parents. We also want to lift Alexa Alger (Cassie’s good friend) up in prayer as she is having major back surgery on Monday. We love you Algers and are praying for you!

Rondo

We just got back from Rondo. It’s a retreat center in the middle of the Kakamega rain forest. Tom and I wanted to take our parents because it is one of the prettiest places we have ever been. We all loved it, and had a great time. It was refreshing to look out the windows and see beauty; I had no idea how much my soul was thirsting for it. Looking out and seeing the hand of God was amazing; creation truly does point to the creator. When we came back to Kisumu this afternoon, I literally felt the energy drain from my body. All the things that were refreshed in me at Rondo feel as though they are slowly being sucked back out. I can’t explain the feeling, but it’s overwhelming. I wish that I had a better attitude, I wish that I could stop looking at all the difficulties and instead focus on the blessings. But how do I do that? There are times I don’t even want to try, it somehow feels better to sulk in my own selfishness. I”m tired and I have only been here a short time. How do I bloom where I am planted when there are times I feel like I’m dying inside? Maybe the reason I feel so down is that I was surrounded by God’s handiwork for two glorious days and now I’m back in the trenches breathing in dirt and looking at filth. The transition is difficult and I find myself not wanting to walk down this path any longer. Do you ever feel like you want out? Like what the Lord has asked of you is too much? I’m tired of sickness, I could live my whole life without coming face to face with another amoeba. I’m tired of trying to figure out the best ways to solve the problems of this continent. I hate always being serious and frustrated, I just want to be like I was for those days in Rondo, relaxed and calm. I know the Lord has not called me to an easy life, but somehow I feel cheated that I don’t get to be at home. Please forgive my whining, I know I have nothing to complain about, my life is blessed, but tonight is just one of those nights I want to pack up and leave. Please pray for my attitude and my selfishness. Please pray that I would have an eternal perspective and that I will let go of my own will. I need your help Lord, I don’t want to live as a double minded person anymore, I want to serve you, but letting go of my will is beyond me, take over. I open my hands to you and lift up all that I have because I trust you Lord, steadfast my willing heart.

The Dreaded Amoeba

It has been a rough week for everyone here. My dad, my friend Lindsay and my Sammers have all been sick. My dad and Lindsay have definitely been the worst. In fact, my dad said, that besides going through Chemo this is the sickest he has ever been. He is now being treated for two amoebas and a bacteria called Shegella. All of those things are either food or water born, but we can't figure out where he and Lindsay got them from because we have all been eating the same things. Sam is a different story altogether, A few days ago I found him being naughty and playing in some nasty water, I pretty much knew it was just a matter of time before his sickness started. All the sickies are now on antibiotics and anti-parasite medicine and are doing better (not great, but better). Because of all the drama here, it has come to our attention that no one wants to visit us anymore. Thanks Pop, you ruined our chances of ever seeing friends and family in Africa. We have decided to take action, we aren't going to take this laying down, instead we will step up the fight against all this bad press and pray that the Lord will bring all of you here. That's right, you heard me, every last one of you. Tom and I are confident of God's ability to do this, we figure if He can get me here, He can get anyone here. Just beware, the Westfall's are praying!

Pray that my dad will recover completely so we can show him around Kisumu. Monday we are leaving for Rondo, it is in the Kakamega rainforest and is absolutely beautiful. I think it will be a treat for everyone to leave this sick house and go to the rainforest. We will be there until Wednesday, please pray that everyone is able to go so that they can see a different side of Kenya.

Sickness, toilets, and bugs...Welcome to Africa

My dad has been sick for the past two days. We have been praying for him today as his fever has been pretty high. We made him (and I mean forced him) to go to the lab for some blood work. His Malaria test was negative, which we were excited about, but the fact remains that he is still sick. so if you think about it please pray for him. I will keep you posted on his condition.

Besides my dad's illness we have been having a lot of fun together. Tom and Brian have been busy with all the repairs that our house needs. It seems that everyday something else breaks here, I am going to start referring to this place as the money pit. Brian agrees with me, and is, even now, going to place a pan under the toilet because he just found a new leak. I guess I need to be thankful that we have a toilet, even if some of the water finds its way onto the floor. I can handle a small leak, it is the giant waterfalls that I have a problem with. This morning my mom and I came home to a bathroom covered in water, in fact, it was so wet that all the linoleum tiles stared popping off. Brian got right on the job, and by the afternoon our toilet was fixed. Tonight it is the toilet in the other bathroom that is having problems, I guess when it rains it pours.

Not only do we have leaky toilets, we seem to have a major ant infestation in our vehicle. We can't figure out where they live, but one thing is for sure, there are a lot of them. Zach spent the day cleaning the inside of the car, with the hope that it takes care of the problem. If I didn't think that our pest control man spayed "breeding potion" I might have him come and spray our car. But the last time our pest man rode up on his bicycle he had a big can of chemical strapped to the back that promised death, but brought about procreation. Imagine my disappointment when instead of 100 ants we had 100,000 ants in our kitchen. When instead of no bats, we had them flying around our family room. I'm going out on a limb here, but I'm guessing that man is in the wrong line of business.

Even with sickness, leaky toilets and unwanted bugs we are all having a good time, or at least I am!

My Prayer For All Of Us

I was just in prayer and thought I would let you know how I am praying for all of us.

Lord help us to be a people with undivided hearts. Help us to trust you. Let us recognize you and follow you, make us desire your will. Let us put off anything that hinders us or binds us, so that we can be completely yours. Help us to not believe the lie that you don’t have our best interest in mind, but fill our minds with the truth of your word. You are bigger than our situations and our circumstances. Help us not make you into a small powerless god, but see you for who you really are, the King of Kings and the Lord of Lords. Open our minds to your magnificent power and help us to realize that power lives in each one of us that call you Master. We are your servants, teach us to serve, not to glorify our own names, but to make your name known. Strengthen our faith so that we can step out when you call. Lord help us to live a life that pleases you and not man. Let us be willing to look like a fool for you Jesus. We are weak Father, but you are strong, strengthen us to walk the road before us.

I love all of you, and just wanted you to know that I am lifting you up to the Father.

They're Here

My heart overflows with blessing. I am in awe of a God that gives so many gifts to a person that is undeserving. The last few months have been an intense battle of wills, I want to do the Lord's will, but I can't seem to give up my own. This battle has left me exhausted at times, but as I look back I feel like the Lord has done a great work in my heart. I would never pray to be put in the fire, but it is sweet when, at last, you come out of it, and see how it has refined you. I feel like God has given me a gift in bringing our parents here, it has given life to a tired servant. To hear familiar voices and see and touch people that I love; it has blessed me beyond measure. I don't deserve this gift, but God has given it to me anyway. Isn't that just like Him, it always come back to grace, unmerited favor. Time and time again He gives me such great gifts, and I stand at His throne empty handed; nothing to give back, but a willing heart, and a poured out life. I pray that the Lord will steadfast my willing heart. I want to give my life completely over to him, but I tend to get distracted by the unimportant. Thank you Father that you are all powerful and can take my willing heart and use it for you glory.

Thank you for letting me preach, sometimes I am just overcome by the God I serve. My family arrived yesterday morning and after we picked them up it was a busy day of getting settled. One of the highlights of my day was a video from home that my mom brought. I got to see friends and family doing life and being silly, I cried all the way through it. I will watch that video many times over before I come home in December. It is my connection with the people that mean so much to me. Cassie has now taken it upon herself to send a video message home, so get ready, "The Westfalls Live" is coming to your town soon.

I also wanted to report that we now have a car, thank you God and Shelter Cove. Buying a car has been such a frustrating journey, but now it is finished!!!! Our church at home raised the money for us to buy a car, and I am so excited to finally send them a picture of it with a big note of thanks. I couldn't have asked for a more supportive church, what a blessing they are to us.

While Tom was getting our car in Nairobi, Lindsay and I had a slumber party. All of you who know me, know that I am a big chicken and hate to stay alone. So I made Lindsay, my big protector, spend the night with me, she may be small, but she's feisty. We had a blast, for one blessed night, we were no longer the mothers of children, we were school girls at a sleep over. We watched a movie, stayed up until 3:00 am talking (which has taken me the whole week to recover from,when did I get so old?), and did African beauty masks. The mask promised, "pretty face". We decided "pretty face" didn't sound half bad to us, so we mixed it up, slapped it on, and eagerly awaited the results. I don’t think I achieved pretty face status, for when Zach woke up the next morning he asked me if the mask worked. If that wasn’t bad enough, he then went on to inquire if I had done it right. Thank God for the honesty of children, it takes you from being a giddy school girl to a haggard mom in mere seconds.
Here is a picture of the two pretty faces!!

Fun Sunday!!

The Lord amazes me, His blessings are beyond my comprehension. Today has been a really fun day, and it is a Sunday at that (Sunday's are usually hard). We went to church, out to lunch and then spent the rest of the day swimming (in a pool that had to be about 50% urine, judging by the amount of people and the color of the water). But when Africa is hot and the water is cool somehow the color of the water doesn't seems to matter that much. The blessing wasn't in being able to go to a pool (although that was fun), it wasn't the fact that I can finally swim among bacteria without going through a mental list of the possible diseases I could contract. The blessing was good friends and awesome fellowship. It was talking about the Lord and encouraging each other to keep running the race, even though it is hard. It was laughing and praying and playing and eating pancakes. It was the fact that I truly believe that my Jesus brought a team over from Canada just to encourage my sweet Nattie and Cassie (the team has actually done so much more than this, but this is an answer to prayer). When we first got here Nattie asked us to pray for a friend for her. I could tell that it was really bothering her because she lost her spark. Since we got here she just hasn't been the Nattie we know; until Grayson arrived. He is a five year old boy with a love for pretend and movies (what more could Nattie ask for) they are two peas in a pod and Nattie is finally back to her old self. Grayson has a twelve year old sister named Dani, who Cassie absolutely loves. Cass needed a friend also and Dani was that gift. Cassie is struggling with the fact that Dani is leaving soon and she will once again be friendless. Cass and I had a great conversation about God, and how he gives us gifts in life; sometimes those gifts are for a long period of time, and sometimes they are for just a season. But we should always be thankful for those gifts.

Today is Monday and I just didn't have it in me to finish this late last night. My eyes were burning, due to the sewage swim or the late night hour I will never know, but alas I am back ready to finish my blog. Tom is flying to Nairobi tomorrow morning and driving home Wednesday. Yes, you heard me right, he is going to pick up our car, I am not going to get too excited about it until I see the car here in Kisumu. Please pray for Tom's safety as he drives home, the roads are terrible and the drive is long. We are blessed to have one of the other missionaries (Mike) go with Tom to help him get back here (as there are no road signs!). Just four more sleeps until my parents and my in-laws come, I can hardly sleep at night because I'm so excited. I'll post a picture of everyone when they get here.